Harmony and peace

In every conversation there are bound to be opinions.

Men are from mars, women are from venus is a book made famous about such issues. Things like men are always trying to solve the problem. Women are just wanting a listening ear. When men want a listening ear, women just can't stop talking. This yes and no game is all part of life. Yet the crux to communication is not just a simple acknowledgement of "I agree, I disagree".

The way I see it is a matter of understanding. You may not have to agree to someone's statement in order to understand it.

For instance,

Bob "I like subject A."
Jimmy "I dislike it very much!" Then Jimmy tries to convince Bob that there is something else better in the world.

Alas that forms the fundamentals of a debate, or in a worse case, dispute.

Some take an alternative route such as silence. To which the noiser feller would go "YES! I won!" but is that really the case? As much as how the kids use to say "Silence means consent!"(and by kids I swear I probably first heard these words come out from my unworldly childish teachers of the past) you and I know that silence doesn't mean anything at all! Much less consent.

Silence then becomes a double edged sword whereby it can give a wrong impression but at the same time it may save the day. More often than not. Less is more. And that is often the killer point in solving any disputes.

Here's my opinion. At the end of the day, silence is fine. However a lack of understanding is not. If Jimmy really hates subject A, that is his opinion and he does not have to force it down Bob's throat. Fair enough he can voice his opinions to let Bob know how nasty things can be, but one man's meat is another man's poison. And if this man chooses to be extreme about it, that is also his choice and there's no point arguing about it (unless its going to cost him his life) and trying to make him feel any less positive or negative.

At the end of the day, people disagree all the time. Even if you don't agree, the most important thing to note is that you should still try to understand the other party. By understanding I'm not saying that you have to share similar opinions, or even fully know the reasons for that person's choice; but rather, take a side step and understand the emotions of the person and why he felt that way.

With that, one may come to learn another facet of another's life and choices.

Some of these choices are like works of art. Sometimes you just add that extra stroke or chose that particular piece simply because you felt like it. THERE IS NO REASON. And even that is a good reason (unless overplayed)

And if you truly love somebody, than you should also learn to understand why he/she isn't able to understand you as well.

And the cycle continues

JJ